We come to recognize truths by over-all studies of the majority. In studies and observations of human behavior and its affects on any relationship between people, be it marriage, friendship, companionship, or lovers- working, playing, political, religious, as well as family- versatility seems to be the winner as the over-riding factor for success. Compatibility which is the stabilizing component in any relationship requires versatility and flexibility. The more rigid and inflexible either or both the partners- the more likely the relationship will fail.
The natural and myriad differences in peoples personalities can and will collide quite frequently throughout the relationship, requiring the flexibility of constant adjustment to each others differences. True compatibility is managed when people fit together well, without the bedevilment of the demons of friction.
Like the pieces of a puzzle, where each extension finds and fits into an empty space, we sing the ditty of Jack Sprat who could eat no fat and his wife who could eat no lean- so between them both, they licked the platter clean., which demonstrates that opposites can be compatible.
In any relationship, we must first know what we need and want from it- as well as the wants and needs of the other. Very seldom, if ever, will these needs be the same aside from the surface labels. Beneath the surface label of Love- the individual kinds of Love may be varied. Determining the love needs of each other requires focus and understanding- filling them requires versatility and flexibility.
Relationships are psychological concepts, as is compatibility; unlike chemistry, sexual attraction, or public persona which are ephemeral components that do not wear well. It is compatibility that holds relationships together over long periods of time.
Versatility seems to work best as an important key to a compatible relationship of any kind. It can open the doors of understanding, recognition of each others needs, communication and sexual intimacy; as well as finding an effective fix for whatever is broken. Rigidity can easily break in the winds of life, while flexibility bends with them and survives. Rigidity can cause frustration anxiety and stress; versatility provides many more avenues of relaxed travel.
Although similarity in basic life components can be vital to compromise in a relationship, and it’s true that we are able to reach these all important compromises more easily when we share similar values and interests- everything above that is free-parking….so to speak. In quoting a wise WryteStuff writer- “I never learned anything from some one who always agrees with me,” we may see that too much similarity can be stagnant and unproductive- lacking the necessary element of interesting contrast in a relationship. The ability to examine another’s point of view may bring us insights and knowledge we may not have otherwise encountered. The more we have to choose from, the better our choices will be.
The most sited reason for break-ups in any relationship is “incompatibility,” and even though the basic components may match in similarities, the downfall seems to stem from the failure of one or both of the parties involved to meet the important individual needs of the other.
As we each determine the individual needs of the other; and with versatility, adjust what we bring with us, we may produce the compatibility of interlocking pieces which will reveal the completed puzzle- picture of our relationship. With the coin of determination and versatility we may purchase a valuable, enduring work of art.